“Life
happens for you, not to you.” ~
Tony
Robbins
I read a
small book by Anthony “Tony” Robbins once that a friend of mine gave me. I
found it inspiring, and his suggestions good. Hard to follow, but sound.
The Netflix feature
length documentary, Tony Robbins: I Am Not Your Guru, follows Tony through
a weeklong event called Date With Destiny,
which was held in Boca Raton, Florida. Joe Berlinger, a documentary filmmaker,
directs it. Tony gives conferences worldwide and this was just one of the many
offerings he schedules for his followers.
The film is
not rated, but I’d give it an R rating as it features very liberal use of the
f-word by Tony during the event. He explained that all cultures have certain
taboo words, and when he uses these taboo words, it keeps people in the present
and engaged. Perhaps.
Over 2,500
people attend an event such as this, paying over $4,000 each to attend. That
should give you an idea about the financial status of people he attracts. Tony
has a fleet of helpers, some of whom are assigned to groups of people as a kind
of moderator or group leader for the individual, and for the group exercises
they engage in when not in the main convention area listening to Tony.
I had heard
some of Tony’s background previously; his growing up in poverty in an abusive home,
a bout with homelessness that inspired him to “sculpt” his life and his persona
so his family will never have to endure such deprivations or angst.
I found the
documentary fascinating. Some really troubled people, abused themselves, attend
these conventions and we see their sharing and Tony’s response live. I found
him to be authentic, compassionate, intuitive and sometimes unpredictable.
Participants bring other members of the audience to tears, as they sometimes
did me. Tony says change can happen in a moment. And for some in the audience,
it did.
Unconventional
in his approach, he apparently has a wide following. I liked some of what he
was saying. He says he’s not just a positive thinker kind of guy, and seems to
really emphasize action.
I thought
there was a good balance of private talks with Tony (for the viewer to get some
of his personal history), live coverage of the event and of what the
participants were doing, along with updates on the few individuals who had
interventions with Tony that were a focus in the film.
I have a
Master’s degree in Counseling Psychology and have spent many years as a
therapist in all types of situations. After watching this documentary, I would
caution you to take what you need and leave the rest. I didn’t care for every
technique Tony used to help people, but some of what he was advocating are things
I will use in my own life. I recommend it if you have a curiosity about
psychology, the science of change, or just about people and their stories.